I've found that life can come at you hard and fast in the mornings.
Most days begin in a blur. Before I even know it Brayden is out the front door on his way to meet the school bus and Gage has long since taken off into the playroom to happily push little wooden trains around. Meanwhile, this mom here still doesn't even remember rolling out of bed yet thanks to my internally ingrained autopilot mode. Soon enough Gage is trotting through the kitchen calling for a snack and I still haven't even gotten it together enough to butter myself a slice of toast.
Some days remembering to make myself breakfast is a victory.
And from that point on the day can wash over you like a tidal wave where it’s hard to catch a breath, look around, and plan a way forward. It can become nothing more than defense all day long.
I’ve been trying to change that.
Life in our house is a rush, kids zipping by all day long, needing your attention and love. Sometimes it makes me dizzy. Most times I sit down at the end of the day wondering just where the hours flew to, because they passed in a flash. We're always running on full speed. This mom's engine is seriously close to blowing.
Every morning, still in my daze, I head over to my Keurig and make myself a cup of coffee. Some days it's a bold roast, packed full of zing to get me going. Some days it's a flavored treat, like today's Cinnamon Roll was. And some days it's just whatever I happen to grab at the time because I'm too tired to care and just need the boost of caffeine that I'm sure it will bring.
But more than that, I'm choosing to fill my cup up to the very top with life. I brew then sweeten with milk and sugar, stealing away for a few moments to not only savor it but also to center myself. I drink deeply those few moments of peace. And then I do it all over again, after the sun has set and the children are tucked into their beds, only this time I've swapped out the coffee for tea.
Each and every time I steal away and bring the mug to my lips I stop and ask myself, what am I filling up on right this very second, because it's so much more than just coffee or tea. I need to fill up on fruit.
And so these are the things that I strive to pour into my empty self. I want them to fill me up from my toes to my hairline and then let them spill over my head and into this house and into the people who live with me. Some days even just one of these fruits poured only as far as my ankles can make all the difference.
I do not want to live my life in a frenzy anymore. I want it to be fruitful and I want to savor it like the saving grace that is my morning coffee and my evening tea. And I'll do just that, right there, between last night’s bedtime meltdown and this morning’s accident all over the bathroom floor.